All The Nice Girls Love an Arsehole

All the nice girls love an arsehole,

It's oh so plain to see
That being a shit
Will make you so fit
For the girls who are young, fit and free.

They all love a daring young caveman,

A loudmouthed Neanderthal cad
Revving up for a race
In a car full of bass
And sneering at anyone sad.

Only sad dogs fancy a nice guy -

All wimpish and socially dumb...
Whose passionate mind
Is hiding behind
A shyness he can't overcome.

The arseholes have got the monopoly -

They are sainted as hard men and prized
As dangerous and tough
But when they get rough
With their girlfriends - Well, what a surprise!

When an arsehole mistreats a nice girl,

It's the good guys who suffer the mob
For "All men are scum!"
Yet the arseholes are numb
To the cries of the Girl Power squads.

So lads, change your lives - become arseholes!

You might lose your old friends, but soon
The fashionable crowd
Will gather around
And your sex life will pole-vault the moon.