Aspiring, achieving your goals,
If you don't understand why you're living,
At least you're not Jeremy Coles!
For Jeremy Coles is a Sadsack,
He says he's from Outer Space!
And Doctor Who's latest adventures
Are written all over his face.
A bunch of his friends got together
To talk about Star Trek and stuff,
They said they were building a spaceship,
They thought they were clever enough!
The anoraks laboured in earnest
As we sat and joked in the pub,
Between reading Penthouse and Beano
They modelled their fantasies' hub.
The Sadsacks have landed their spaceship
On a world that don't half look an ass...
The Earth now their oyster, the people
Half dead - on lager and laughing gas.